Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Daily Draw - Judgment

Today I am working with the Nigel Jackson Tarot, which has also been published as the Medieval Enchantment Tarot.  This copy has been beautifully trimmed by a forum friend.

I do not find "Judgment" to be the best name for the card, as to most of us to be be judged is extremely negative.  I prefer to think of it as "Awakening" or "Rebirth".

I drew Judgment today, which I think is a fitting card for my (triumphant) return to tarot.  The angel blows his horn in a blaze of glory, searing away everything that no longer serves, and awakening the figures to a whole new way of life.

I have had a bit of a dark night of the soul kinda thing going on, and to be welcomed back like this feels like a giant, warm hug from Spirit,  encouraging me to forge ahead and to be welcome.  Awake, and be free of it, the card seems to be crying out.

I am going to be happy, no matter what that takes, and anyone who doesn't want my happiness can just go the opposite way of this angel, and take plenty of ice water with them.  I am going to live my life differently, in a way that is pleasing to me, and I am done with just "getting by."  That is no way to live at all.  I am going to love who I love and do what is most fulfilling to me. 

In a very tarot twist, my shadow card is Death today, which of course only makes sense.  I believe the shadow card, the one at the bottom of the deck, is the information we do not want to see, so we place it as far from ourselves as we can.

If Judgment is the celebration of the freedom of letting the old go, when it is past its' time, Death is the hard work of doing so.  Death is the crying in the corner, curled into the fetal position, it-hurts-so-bad-I'd-almost-rather-die-than-give-this-thing-up work of getting to the freedom and enlightenment promised by Judgment.  Death is dry old bones rattling around, and Judgment is jubilant celebration of life.

As much as I try to make a brave face of it, though, change is hard for me, as it is for most of it, but change is the one thing most likely to cause my anxiety to flare.  But I am not a coward, right?  And I want the good things promised with the new day, so if walking through the valley of the shadow of death (not literally, of course) is the coin then I will gladly pay it.

These images are from the Nigel Jackson Tarot, by Llewellyn publishing.


  1. I recently told someone that I missed your posting here.

    I keep going through phases of receiving the Death card; tonight, with my Fairytale, I received the Eight of Cups with Death as my shadow... both cards related to loss, and I'm not sure if they're related to a relationship that's gone south, or if they're warning me that my dog isn't out of the woods, with a health problem, despite having appeared to feel better earlier on... I'm terrible when it comes to letting things go, but I wish I'd paid attention when I was younger, and faced everything that brought, what I felt at the time, was uncontrollable anxiety, that left me hiding from life. I wonder what I would have done, where I might be (if I'd still be complaining about the decisions I'd made... ;) ).

    I'm sorry to hear you've been so low, but it's really nice to see you posting again. :)

  2. Hi, Angela!

    I have missed posting, too, but I have been in such a funk that I would not have been doing the world any favors spreading it around, haha.

    I'm sorry your dog is ill. It's hard to watch them suffer, and they can't tell us what is worng. I will be sending lots of love and light to both of you.

    Change is definitely hard, but I believe Anais Nin summed it up - "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. "

    Of course, I say that, and I type pretty brave, but that is a moment by moment kind of thing to have to face. Probably a good thing for both of us to remember is, life never offers just one chance. every single day we can choose something different.

    So good to "see" you, Angela!

  3. Yay you're posting again! Nice to see you back.