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I drew an apt pair of cards to begin working with this non-traditional deck, which is neither a tarot nor a Lenormand, and which follows a unique to itself system. Heroine II and The Call -
When we are called to our destiny, or even just our duty, it is always up to us to take up our weapon of choice and accept it. We can choose to be a part of history or we can watch it happen. Time passes either way, and we have to make the choice that will leave us with the least regret and which will make our tomorrows look the way we wish.
The imagery in these cards strike me on a deep and personal level. Once a story, fully formed and perfect already, popped into my head, and I began to record it. The opening lines spoke of of a steel grey sky and the bony fingers of weathered trees reaching towards the wan sunlight in homage. I loved the story, and it was not so much mine as I was its' keeper and caregiver. Spoiler alert, I did not write a heartbreaking work of staggering genius that took the lists by storm and deeply touched the souls of my readers. What I did do was get scared, get timid, and let my ex tell me that writing is stupid and I needed to spend my time doing something that would actually yield results. And that story, it is gone. It is a few pages scrawled in a now tattered notebook, which fills me with grief when I see it. That is the end of the story in its' incarnation as my story, but I certainly do hope it moved along to someone who was ready and willing to excavate it bravely and with the respect it deserved. As for me, I can only regret my choice to not honor that call and vow to do better next time. Which, as it happens, is today. And again every day after that.
Some of my big, grand work has to do with developing and valuing my own creativity, and I know that, but sometimes our callings are things we may think are smaller, but they are no less worthy. Some of my small callings are to make meals for my family, to provide opportunities to create memories, to love on my pets and love on my man. And to master winged eyeliner. These are small things which will not change the world, except that maybe the only way the world changes is via these small things which shape lives and hopefully human compassion.
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