Daily Draw- So Much Energy!

Maybe it has to do with Mercury going direct yesterday, but really it has been months I have been fighting lethargy and battles with myself just to get the most basic of things done.  Yesterday I felt as if a cloud had lifted and I was inspired, no, even driven to complete projects begun long ago and make headway on new ones.  Whatever the reason, I am grateful for it and I will take it!

Still, I am interested in keeping this momentum going so I would like to know where the sudden burst of energy has come from so I have the best possible options to sustain it and make it into a way of life.  So I did what I usually do- I asked my cards where my energy has come from.

Bonefire Tarot- Queen of Wands, Knight of Swords

I am using a method outlined in Dusty White's Advanced Tarot Secrets, which has become my best friend in tarot reading over the past couple months.  He calls it "Hero and Sidekick" and it is basically a method for linking the cards and having them strike up a conversation.  As you look at a pair of cards, drawn in relation to a query, you decide which of them is the hero, the main card of the answer, and you use the other card as a sidekick, a way to modify the meaning of the first card and fine tune it to your reading and question.  This is a tool I find invaluable as I believe the nuanced message of each reading lies in the context of the reading, which is achieved with a specific question, a positional meaning, or the interaction between the cards (or any combination and whatever other methods you prefer).  Without these things, I am often left guessing where a card falls on its' spectrum of meaning.  Intuition is an important component in reading cards, but one of my favorite aspects of tarot cards is that they show up, always, even if intuition decides to have a margarita at the beach instead.

The Queen of Wands is the one I am least likely to associate myself with, as I am a practical and sensual, sometimes overbearing Queen of Pentacles to my core, sometimes a sharp witted, sharp tongued, clear seeing Queen of Swords, and less often but still reliably a sensitive and sometimes over empathetic Queen of Cups.  But the Queen of Wands, with her confidence and creative force, no not so much.  Clearly I need to channel some more of this fine and fast lady, because I owe this burst of energy to embracing a bit more of her archetype.  I am going to wear that hat, because damn!  I am hot because I'm fly.  At least I feel so today.

The Knight of Swords brings a burst of masculine energy, or maybe he is being brought by his white horse, fairly out of control, which to me symbolizes a new found willingness to work with what is unpredictable in my life, and to ride the energy, wherever it takes me, for as far as it will go.  It's a wild ride, but exhilarating.  The two together create a burning combination, with air to feed the fire, and water to control the boundaries of the flame so that it can be fully utilized without burning.  In practical terms, this means I am uniquely able at this time to channel my emotions and my skills into my work without letting the intensity of them bowl me over.  It is a balancing act, although that precarious Knight shows it is more about faith than skill right now.

Bonefire Tarot- Emperor

I had a bit of help interpreting the Queen of Wands as her Aries self in full glory because twice while shuffling The Emperor decided to take a flying leap out of the stack.  The Emperor rules over boundaries and gives structure to that which may otherwise lay about all loose-y goose-y not ever living up to its' full potential.  Or their full potential, as is the case with me.  I need structure and I know it.  I have been made acutely aware of that and rather than returning to an imposed structure of working for THE MAN, which is not possible anyway, I must take control of my own domain and impose a structure I can both work in and love.  With style.  Like the Queen of Wands.

Are you struggling with blocks in your creative, professional, personal life, or in your relationships?  Book a reading today and we can either power through them together, or softly fold them, wherever the cards lead us.  You may be surprised, as I was today, by who you find waiting for you on the other side!






These images are from Bonefire Tarot, self published by Gabrielle West.

Daily Draw- King of Swords, Knight of Swords, Ten of Cups

What I have to remember, what matters most, is the way this reading ends- the Ten of Cups, happily ever after, the rainbow happy ending most of us long for, and that I have considered essential to my happiness.  I have that now.

Mystic Dreamer Tarot- King of Swords, Knight of Swords, Ten of Cups

This reading is full of people, with two of the three cards being people or personalities.  I think they are probably both aspects of myself.  The King of Swords is my intellect, and the looming Moon behind him is how my feelings affect that intellect.  I choose words carefully and with great intent, and nothing irritates me more than having my words perverted after I have so carefully chosen them.  I have felt a bit like a warrior lately, and the Knight of Swords reflects that.  I had some words and I let them fly, which is an irony when thinking about how Swords relate to air, and that "words" is Swords without the "s".  I mistype Swords as "words" several times a day.  As I look back at my Major Arcana lens for the week, The Devil, I know that maybe I did not need to say everything I said, but it felt deliciously good to say what I did.  However, I did so in defense of my family, my happy ending, the Ten of Cups that really does mean everything to me.

Mystic Dreamer Tarot- Five of Pentacles

The Shadow Card for this reading is the Five of Pentacles.  I do not want to be left out in the cold, but I own everything I said, and I believe passionately in it.  I don't go around hurting people's feelings just to do so, so if being cast out is a consequence of saying what I had to say, then so be it.  I'll deal with the consequences of those actions like a grown up, because I was not throwing a child's temper tantrum.  I was expressing real concerns and true hurt, and if the person to whom I expressed them does not like that, it is their problem.  I don't feel good about what I said, because I should never have been in the position of having to say so, but I do feel I did the right thing and carry no shame.  I am responsible for what I say, but the reactions of others is their responsibility.

Later on, I have decided that I would like to also use The Wisdom of the House of Night Oracle, and the images of both decks seem compatible.  I have lots of oracle decks, too, and I am trying to decide if I stop collecting them or start using them, because I believe everything in my home should be loved, beautiful, and used.  This deck is based on a book series by P.C. Cast, but I have not read the books, so we will see if that matters as I endeavor to use the deck.

Wisdom of the House of Night Oracle- Listening

The card I drew, "Listening"", is very apt to this situation.  We got to where we are because someone did not listen to what my husband and I were telling them.  The companion manual, by P.C. Cast and Colette Baron Reid, reads, "Drawing this symbol indicates that you are meant to listen to what others are saying with their gestures, rather than their words."  This is a lesson playing out over and over in life, and my kids' lives currently, so I know it is a true reflection of what is happening here.

The inscription on the card reads, "...darkness does not always equate to evil... light does not always bring good."  That is also apt to the situation, as the person who took my tongue lashing today would like to look like "light"and therefore "good".  I think they generally mean to be, too, but this one instance just did not jive with the way I see those things, and I was in a position where I had to say so.

Tomorrow will be a better day.  Nothing ever stays bad for long, not when I have that Ten of Cups to look forward to every day, and this current bit of ugliness shall also pass.



These cards are from Mystic Dreamer Tarot by Heidi Darras and Barbara Moore, published by Llewellyn, and The Wisdom of the House of Night Oracle by P.C. Cast and Colette Baron Reid, published by Potter Style.

Daily Draw- Knight of Wands, Seven of Swords, The Hierophant

First, I need to say a very Happy Birthday to my handsome, wonderful, very nearly perfect husband, whose day it is today, and it will be packed for us!  I am hoping 39 will be the best year of your life, sugar, and I will do everything in my power to make it so!

Guess what else- I had another jumper, just like yesterday, and I am thinking this one is advice for the day ahead, or perhaps an explanation.

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- Knight of Wands, Seven of Swords, The Hierophant

I am not thinking this is going to be the most peaceful day we have had, but we have had two solid days of it, more than we usually get, so I am pleased with that.  Both the Knight of Wands and the Seven of Swords have appeared this week, and neither is a particularly positive message for me, so I am not so happy to see them again.  Actually, the Knight of Wands appeared in a reading I decided not to blog as too personal, but he and I are familiar with each other.

This is not our normal weekend with kids.  My ex is extremely solicitous and willing to work with me, as I am with him, so getting mine to celebrate my husband's birthday has been no issue.  His kids mom, though, is threatening to withhold the kids even though their court orders and parenting agreement clearly state that they are each to be allowed to have the children on their birthdays.  Hers was last month, and she let us know several weeks ahead of time she did not wish to have the kids on her birthday, which fell on our weekend.  My husband does wish to have the kids on his birthday, which falls on her weekend.  I am sorry she did not want to spend her birthday with her kids, but my husband does.  She doesn't get to choose that, and I know it irks her.  These cards reflect that, the fighting Knight of Wands, who is all hot air, and totally turned away from this reading.  I think she would like to withhold the kids, as she has threatened, and we can see that in the sneaky Seven of Swords.  She'd like to steal time that belongs to my husband, and for no true good reason except to hurt him, and it would.  I think she will relent though, as my husband has been clear he will call the police, he will file a report, and he will ask our lawyer to press contempt of court charges against her if she does not relinquish the kids as requested, and the stern Hierophant reflects her fear of punitive actions.  I believe it is not Justice that appears here, because I do not think she is looking for Justice.  She just doesn't want to upset the powers that be, and she shouldn't.

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- Nine of Pentacles

My jumper is the Nine of Pentacles.  I absolutely do not understand why she wants to fight with my husband over every single kid issue, but that is because I stand on my own two feet, and always have.  My belief, through my personal knowledge of her (which is great; but that is a story for another day) and my personal readings on the subject lead me to believe she has a lot of issues with her dad, which get played out in these power struggles with my husband because she does not have the ability to work out her daddy issues, or chooses not to, because Daddy pays the bills in that family (she has not worked in over 14 years.  We should all be so lucky, I sometimes think, but then, especially when I look at the Nine of Pentacles, I know that I'd rather be independent than not work, especially as I know what her father's money has cost her).  She can't risk his ire, but she can, and does, fight with my husband.

The Nine of Pentacles, this self made, self sufficient woman, explains why I don't understand her- we do not operate from the same view of life, that simple.  We were both single mothers to the same age children, and we handled it in two totally different ways.  It's not my place to judge her, but I know I did the best I could with what I had, and while she has been more financially secure than I have, I would not trade places with her for anything.  That white dove symbolizes peace, of the utmost importance to me, and she and I just have no common ground to meet on, nor does she want to, which is fine.  Her choice to make, and her loss of me as a friend and ally.

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- Ten of Swords

The Shadow Card is the Ten of Swords, which is one I rather like, but the Ten of Swords often denotes drama to me.  You need one Sword to do a lot of damage.  Ten is just overkill.

Unfortunately, I think we have to be prepared for drama tomorrow, and I hate that.  My kids should never have to see it.  You can hurt me all you want, and I don't care.  I have to give a fig what you think about me in order for you to hurt me, and I just don't in this case.  But hurt my kids, any five of them, and I am wounded to my core.  The Hierophant appears to me to be shedding tears, and that is the card that corresponds to my astrological sign of Taurus.  I may cry today, and I hate that, too.  My husband is a good person, a great dad, an amazing husband, and he deserves to have a happy birthday, not one rife with drama and fighting.

In this case, I deeply hope I am wrong, and the cards are just reflecting the possibilities in this moment.  I hope by the time we are to receive the kids she has come to the right decision and doesn't inflict pain on them or my husband, as well as my other kids.  Her problems should not become the problems of the innocent.

The Knight of Wands is by artist Mike Wilson.
The Seven of Wands is by artist Brenda Flatmo.
The Hierophant is by artist Daniel Albrigo.
The Nine of Pentacles is by artist Vic Back.

The Ten of Swords is by artist Noodles.

These cards are from Tarot of the Tattoo Age, a collaborative project self published by Flaco Productions, LLC.

Daily Draw- Knight of Swords, Queen of Swords, Seven of Swords

There is a whole lotta Sword-ness going on in these cards!  Lots of words flying (I mistype "Swords" as "Words" many times a day), lots of communication, and even though Swords are airy in most systems, this feels like a lot of Fire to me, so those Elements feed each other in this set of cards.

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- Knight of Swords, Queen of Swords, Seven of Swords

That Knight of Wands may believe he has captured his dragon, but is he riding it or is it carrying him off?  Is he coming or going?  This Queen of Swords weeps tears of blood, having been so thoroughly pierced they have nowhere else to go.  If we run out of water for our tears, do we begin to use our blood?  How many tears would we have to cry to get there?  The imp in the Seven of Swords does solemnly swear he is up to no good, and his materialism at all costs may be his downfall, but he is going to enjoy every moment of it while he can.

For me, these cards perfectly embody how I feel about "Black Friday" and the whole shopping season that surrounds Christmas.  I despise it in every way.  I hate Black Friday that forced my brother's girlfriend to work at 8pm on Thanksgiving Day, I hate the rampant consumerism, I hate the kids counting presents, and I am sickened by the thought of cutting my holiday short so that we can buy things.

The Man, however, loves Black Friday, and any bargain, he loves to shop, to give presents and to get them, for the holidays.  I have nothing against presents, persay, just I don't like them around what should be a sacred holiday, and there is no reason for me to get a gift on Jesus' birthday.  I love to give and give gifts for no reason, at other times.  While fighting is too strong a word for what has been going on in our house, we definitely have different ideas about what Christmas is, and they come out at this time of year.  I want to build traditions, to have experiences, and make memories, which I think happens by spending time and thoughtfully following old and making new traditions.  The Man has nothing against this, but his solution to most problems is to throw money at the situation.  The actual money or gifts are not the issue, which is why there are no Pentacles in this reading (yet) but our communications about the money and gifts are, especially today, one of my least favorite days of the year, and that is why this reading is full of heated Swords.  It's a day off for both of us, right after a very blessed, but hectic holiday, and we have had several months packed with kids' activities and surgeries.  I wanted to snuggle up close to him, sleep in a little, and just enjoy a well earned day of rest.  He wanted to get up, get going, and spend the day buying things.  I hate shopping.  But I love him.  So there we are.

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- Three of Pentacles

The Shadow Card is the Three of Pentacles, this one portrayed with sobbing babies,  I need to stop being a baby and insisting on getting my way.  This family is a collaboration, a traditional meaning for the Three of Pentacles, and it works because The Man makes it work, and is willing to do anything for me.  I owe him no less, and there are very few of my convictions that matter more to me than his feelings.  Some, but not many, so I need to just let go of my resentment of spending time and money to provide things I don't believe anyone needs, because it makes him happy to do this.  So I will.

There are no Majors in this reading, no Devil, so I know this is not a serious issue.  It is just a mild disagreement, and we aren't even fighting about it.  The money spent won't break us, and there will be more time to spend quietly this weekend.  There is little to actually complain about, just a compromise to be made.

The Knight of Swords is by artist Mike Wilson.

The Queen of Swords is by artist William Thidemann.

The Seven of Swords is by artist Jef Kopp.

The Three of Pentacles is by artist Jeff Wright.

These cards are from Tarot of the Tattoo Age, a collaborative project self published by Flaco Productions, LLC.

Daily Draw- King of Wands, Nine of Wands, Knight of Pentacles

I have been trying to avoid various combinations of these cards for the past 24 hours.  The fact that no matter how many times I have shuffled, how much I have tried to have my own way with the cards but I continue to pull these ones, tells me they have a message I need to decipher today.  If I am being really honest, the fact that I don't want to deal with these cards, says that I really do need to face them.

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- King of Wands, Nine of Wands, Knight of Pentacles

Although two Court Cards, the King of Wands and the Knight of Pentacles, bookend this reading I believe they are hinged on the Nine of Wands in the middle.  I am tickled at how, upon first glance, the Nine of Wands reminds me of a fully dressed Thanksgiving turkey, even though through a closer look we see it is beautifully decorated skull.  I have offered to have Thanksgiving dinner at my house, while not large, but I am a little overwhelmed by the enormity of the project I have undertaken.  That is probably reflected in the bravado of the King of Wands, who has no doubt he can do whatever he feels like he wants to in a given moment, but now he has turned away from the issue, at least in this reading.  I volunteered, cheerfully, gladly, because I feel I should care for my family in this way, and I want to.  I just am not in the physical shape to do so, but I ignored that, almost arrogantly, when I said, "Let's do Thanksgiving here."  I can even relate the solidarity and soldier-like attitude of a traditional Nine of Wands to the steadfast plan and not giving up attitude one must have to cook such an enormous meal.  The Knight of Pentacles, who as an aside, I am amused was rendered in shades of grey, which suits him so well, when the artists were of this deck were randomly assigned cards, and most had no prior tarot knowledge, is looking towards the problem, and offers the solution-make a plan, stick to it, don't go too fast, keep my head, and just keep moving forward.  We'll all eat eventually, and although the King of Wands speaks of my need to please and really do an amazing meal, he is not really paying attention to the situation, while the ever pragmatic Knight of Pentacles is fully vested, and he says, "Sometimes good enough has to be good enough.  We'll get through today, and we'll aim to dazzle next time."

Tarot of the Tattoo Age- The Moon

The Shadow Card of my reading is The Moon, which is an irony, as I see this position as something I don't know, something hidden, but something I should know, or something I need to deal with but have put far away from myself.  It has appeared here for two reasons, the first one being my reluctance to deal with these cards, to admit that I can't do everything, that sometimes my mouth writes checks my debilitated body can't cash.

The second reason probably has to do with my nervousness at seeing my brother.  I love him, I adore him, and so he has great power to hurt me, and has.  I am sure I have hurt him, too, so I am not begging excuse from my wrongs.  We have not been in close contact since our former stepfather, the only dad either of us ever really had, for what it was worth, passed away on Valentine's Day of this year.  We both had strong reactions to his death, and they were reactions that did not allow us to grieve together.  I want so much for this day to bring reconciliation, and I believe it will, but I am afraid.  The Moon, though, says that we can't stay where we are, and we must move forward, even if it's scary, because there is no way back, either.  So forward we go, my beloved brother and I, and hopefully for the best.

Just for the record, I have a lot of help- my brother and his lovely girlfriend are making the turkey, my father in law is bringing appetizer trays, my aunt offered any help I may need, and my husband and kids will do absolutely anything for me.  I am not martyring myself for this day.  I am surrounded by loving support and willing helping hands, for which I am ever thankful!  Further, I want to do this.  My father in law would have hosted, or I am sure my aunt or brother would have, but I love playing the hostess, and I am thrilled I get to have so many people I love gathered under my roof, to care for and feed!

The King of Wands is by artist D.J. Rose.
The Nine of Wands is by artist Charlie Grrl.

The Knight of Pentacles is by artist Jason Kelly.
The Moon is by artist Scott Sylvia.

These cards are from Tarot of the Tattoo Age, a collaborative project self published by Flaco Productions, LLC.