I'm leaving on a jet plane. Don't know when I'll be back again...
Actually, I do. Monday.
But last night I had a reading at Denver Tarot Meetup that suggested my trip might not go as smoothly as I would like it to. The Chariot decided to be reversed in the physical aspects part of the spread, and while my reader was a newbie to tarot, I totally believe the reading is valid regardless of the experience level of the reader. My question was if she could tell me what I might need to know about the upcoming trip to San Francisco. She could, in fact, and the first card that showed itself was the Chariot... reversed (cue level down music).
The Dragon's Duel card definitely resonates with my inner conflict. I am not an easy traveler, being excessively home bodied. I also feel guilty about using our resources for a trip that is really mostly just for me. The Man will go, happily, as he is a traveling Sadge, but I feeeeeel bad. I am just not sure that what I want is what is right for my family in this precise moment, and I have women's disease so I think it all comes down to me; I am responsible for everyone, everyone's happiness depends on how I perform in all my sundry roles, I need to perfect. I'll bet some of you have it, too. (But you shouldn't. You are fabulous!)
Then I asked what was my best advice to combat that feeling- The Chess Queen. This is an advice card, so I can read it positively. I need to trust that I have made the right decision, trust that my kidtauplets and pets are gonna be just fine, trust that we are going to have a good time and be blessed with this mini vacation.
I also need to make a plan, for packing and all the other logistics, because there is comfort in having a plan. Plans should be flexible, but in general are pretty darn good to have.
And if I successfully enact the advice of the Chess Queen, what will my outcome be? The Ice Queen. This was another troublesome card, because it feels like non-movement as well, just like that dastardly Chariot reversed, and I need movement. I need to move like 1500 miles tomorrow! I did not like that card at all, and so I drew another- (this is standard operating procedure, right?)
The Arrow Master, and then I got it! I am going to get what I want, this trip, this time away with The Man and this tarot learning greatness, but I need to detach myself from expected outcomes. I want everything to be perfect, and flow perfectly, and we are hosting a dear friend as a roommate while we are out there, and so I feel responsible for her happiness in this trip as well, and I need not to. I need to make myself like the Ice Queen, the Queen of Swords, who cares and loves and does her best, but does not beat herself up over the little ways things can go sideways.
So, trust- check!
Detachment- sorta check!
Going on a much anticipated trip to a beautiful place- definitely check!
These cards are Wisdom of the Hidden Realms by Colette Baron-Reid for Hay House.