Monday, July 12, 2010

Worst Fear, Best Hope Spread

This is a simple spread I made up, if you can even call it that for such an easy spread, and I use it often.  It works with specific questions and for general readings.  I have a lot of anxiety issues, which I write about a lot, so I am not giving away any secrets here.  I manage them with diet and exercise, yoga, and little rituals and affirmations to help me get through my day.  I operate on the belief that most of the time, the worst fears we have will not manifest, and living in expectation of hope is the best way.  I often draw two cards, labeling the first one, "Worst Fear" and the second "Best Hope".  Often, those two cards give me a lot of comfort and I am soothed.  Sometimes, I will shuffle and draw two more cards, one to show me how to avoid my worst fear, and one to show me how to manifest my best hope.  Other times, I will cut randomly in the deck, a trick I picked up from Dax Carlisle of the Tarot Guild, to see what the Heart of the Matter Card is.  That is what I did today.

My Worst Fear card is the Eight of Wands, which appeared yesterday as well.  As a quintessential Taurus, and with those anxiety issues, movement and change is really hard for me, even good movement and change.  This is a paradoxical card for me, especially in this imagery, with the fast energy of the Eight of Wands and the slow moving snail.  I both crave the movement and things changing, I know in my heart and the very core of my being, that things have to change, but I am terrified by it, too.  I like to plan and plot and know my next move, at all times, yet in that same type of paradox, at times I can be extremely impulsive, going with a gut instinct with only intuition's nudge.  This generally serves me well, and I am learning to trust those nudges.

My Best Hope card is the Hanged Man, represented by a woman in this feminine deck.  This is one of the ironies of tarot which are so delicious!  I'm afraid of being forced into action before I'm ready, but the Hanged Man has been stalking me lately, much as she looks immobile, and I am not going to have to make a move until I am completely, thoroughly, totally ready.  I am getting ready by learning to see things differently, by using this time as a learning experience.  There is a spiritual aspect to this card as well, one that suggests trading comfort for knowledge, of sacrifice and feeling joy in it.

The Heart of the Matter Card is the Queen of Wands, a dynamic and fiery character.  When I am ready to sit and oversee my domain as easily, with as much confidence as she has, I will be ready to leave my Hanged One cocoon, to take on that Eight of Wands movement.  There is a season for everything, and while the advice seems to be that I should be embracing the qualities of the Queen of Wands, cultivating passion, charisma, confidence, inspiration, and charm, I have time to do so.  I don't have to wake up tomorrow transformed, which is a good thing, because I doubt I could.

This seems to be a chatty little deck that wants me to read a lot with it.  I generally don't do a lot of readings for myself, as my life is usually pretty boring.  It has not gotten suddenly more interesting, or anything, but I just can't keep my hands off this deck!

These cards are from the Tarot of the Dream Enchantress by Marco Nizzoli for lo Scarabeo.

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