Tuesday, October 30, 2012

NaNoWriMo 2012

Every year, hell, every day, I tell myself I am going to write, and in November if you are going to write it has to be National Novel Writing Month, otherwise known as NaNoWriMo.  Procrastination is the what kills me, every time, every November, and if I am really honest with myself, every day.

Silver Era Tarot- Two of Cups, Six of Wands, Four of Swords

"Procrastination is one of the most common and deadliest of diseases and its toll on success and happiness is heavy." ~Wayne Gretzky

Even as I am typing this I am looking at Pinterest, checking email, rubbing my sore back and telling myself surely I deserve some time off to deal with that, talking to My Little Big Man about spring league football, planning crafts I want to make (I never want to make crafts so I know this is Resistance), wanting to go get coffee, and watching Hoarder with equal parts fascination and horror.  (My Little Big Man went to fetch me coffee.  One more bonus of having a Kuerig- kidproof coffee and he feels great about helping me!)

obstacles can I expect to encounter this November during NaNoWriMo?  Two of Cups- I have two thoughts as I look at this card.  The first one is that it's hard for me to do anything that takes time away from my husband and my family, because there is so little of it, and it is so vital.  One thing that can counteract that, for me, is that Little Big Man wants to participate this year too, and we can totally sit in companionable silence together, working, plus he is such an interesting writer!

The second thing I think about is that for me, the Two of Cups is often about sacred contracts, the why we came to this world at this time, in this body, what purpose we have.  I have no doubts that writing is one, for me, but because it is so very important to me, I struggle with it.  I want it to be just right.  I want it to be perfect.  And perfect doesn't exist.  I worry about putting something out into the world that is less than perfect, because if I can't do this one thing well, what can I do well?  It's sometimes easier for me to pretend I didn't want the grapes anyway, like the fox in Aesop's fable, than admit I want them more than anything but jut am not sure how to get them.

How can I overcome the obstacle?  Six of Wands- This card makes me chuckle.  Astrologically speaking, it is Jupiter, the most beneficent planet, in Leo, the SuperStar of the zodiac.  What that means for people who don't deal with astrology, is that this card has a lot of well deserved chutzpah.  It may be a little bit arrogant, but it deserves to be.  For me, as advice, what that means is that I need to own my talent.  Sometimes I want to hide behind modesty, to pretend that I am not all that, which sounds like modesty, but really isn't.  It is actually an ugly personality trait, because to waste such a precious resource, like talent, that is Divinely gifted, is nearly blasphemy, and it's actually a way to try to avoid the responsibility that goes along with having a talent.

What will be the end result?  Four of Swords- If I manage to stick to my schedule, and finish NaNoWriMo successfully, I will have earned a well deserved rest, self satisfied and easy in the knowledge I did my best.  Swords have to do with thoughts and ideas, so I think this also means I will have gained a skill which enables me to hold my ideas, suspended, like the three swords above her, ready to implement when I am ready to write them, while I concentrate on the one currently most important.  This will be really valuable to me because, like many creative people, I get overwhelmed with ideas and then I do nothing about any of them.  This card promises I'll gain the skill of organizing those ideas so they can later be utilized.

Silver Era Tarot- Seven of Swords

The Shadow Card of this reading is the Seven of Swords.  In Denver Tarot Geeks one evening, I heard my brilliant friend Rory describe this card as stealing from yourself, robbing yourself of an experience that you needed to have, and this describes me very well.  If I don't do this, I will be stealing an opportunity for myself to grow, learn, and create, from myself.  I will be hurting myself, and to what end?  Just because I love to procrastinate?  Just because I am afraid that what I write won't be "good enough"?  How selfish, how cowardly, and how not who I want to be!
Inspirations for Survivors
The card I pulled from Inspirations for Survivors, also by Aunia Kahn and Russell J. Moon, reads ,"The World is at your fingertips."  I have always known I would not win the lottery, because if I did I would not do the work I was sent here to do.  I have also known that I will be quite successful, which is not arrogance. Clearly, as of yet, I have no right to be arrogant, as I have not published a heartbreaking work of staggering genius, or even much of anything.  That doesn't matter to me, though, because I know I will.  The fact that I haven't yet doesn't affect that at all.

Are you going to participate in NaNoWriMo this year?

These cards are from Silver Era Tarot and Inspirations for Survivors by Aunia Kahn and Russell J. Moon, published by Schiffer Books.

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