Friday, November 16, 2012

What To Do, What To Do

I have a simple question for The Sirian Starseed Tarot today- How is my time best spent today?
Sirian Starseed Tarot- Eight of Flames, Two of Chalices, The Shadow (Devil)

*loud sigh*

I already knew the answer.  The Eight of Flames is traditionally communications for me, and my writing projects, including this blog, are communications and need attention.  In addition, this Eight of Flames is particularly powerful, and some particularly powerful communications are on the slate for today, so I know they are essential.  It is also fast moving, intense energy, so I know a couple of things I would rather save for another day must to get done today, even though I don't feel like I have the energy.  I'll have to dig down deep and come up with it.

The Two of Chalices, all about sacred contracts, and writing is one of mine, as well as reading tarot, and I gratefully have clients today.  That of course has to be done, the writing and the readings, and I am grateful every day that is what my world is made up of.

This card also refers to the love I have for The Man, who has tasked me, even though he doesn't want to, with some time consuming work.  I have been feeling kind of resentful of it, because I don't feel good, and I have plenty enough work of my own to do.  But because we are in a sacred contract together, his work is my work, and he is always so good to us, me, my kids, his kids, our family, and I feel guilty for feeling resentful.  It is a really selfish reaction to not want to help him when he does anything and everything he can for me.

Which brings us to The Shadow, a card which would be called The Devil in a Waite Smith themed deck.  It asks me to examine my emotions, and why I feel guilty.  I feel guilt over some other issues, too, and I need to figure out which ones of those I have legitimate responsibility in and should feel guilt, so therefore need to make amends, and which I feel guilty about because I have Woman's Disease and tend to take things upon myself that I have no business worrying about.  This often looks like a kind of martyrdom, but it is actually a personality flaw and a manifestation of ego; to believe that I am in some way responsible for things that I actually have nothing to do with.
Sirian Starseed Tarot- Karma (Judgment)

We have seen this Shadow Card before, Karma, the twentieth Trump, relating to Judgment, but it is different for me today.  The lotus flower shies through, and the most beautiful lotus flowers bloom from the nastiest ichor at the bottom of the water.  The Eight of Flames, with its' quick communication, the Two of Chalices, things we are meant to do and love to do, combined with The Shadow indicate that some Karmic events have been set in motion, or more likely moved forward today, already having been in motion, and at some point I will have to deal with them, but despite of, or maybe because of, the appearance of The Shadow, and because the lotus bud is drawing my eye, I know that all the energies that are swirling around us ad all of the things happening will, probably fairly quickly, settle into what is best and to everyone's highest good.

I have to believe that, or I am lost.

And I have to go pack up some eBay sales for The Man, and get my kiddos ready for their very busy weekend.  With no resentment, because I chose this life, and I love it.

These cards are from The Sirian Starseed Tarot by Patricia Cori and Alysa Bartha, published by North  Atlantic Books.

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